Skip to main content

Change comes little by little....

There are things about myself I want to change. And sadly, some of those things are things I've wanted to change for many years, and yet, here I am, the same. Why? I think a big part of it is that I haven't had a vision of what is possible. And another part of it is that I get overwhelmed.

Here's how it goes.... I read a parenting book. I vow to be kinder and more patient with my kids. Then something happens where my expectations are not met, and I'm tired and overwhelmed by something else, and my emotion gets the better of me. I do or say something unkind. And then I get upset at myself. And after a few days of this scenario happening again and again, I give up, thinking I'm just not capable of being the kind and patient Mom I want to be.

But in reading The One Thing this week, I gained a new perspective that I know will be beneficial in my journey of change. My goal needs to be mastery. I don't want to just be OK at being patient and kind. I want to be exceptional in my patience and kindness. And The One Thing has reminded me what I read several years ago in The Genius in All of Us: mastery takes time. For great musicians, scientists, and athletes, but also in our character development. Research has shown that most exceptionally talented people worked 10,000 hours to obtain their level of proficiency.

Reading this, it finally clicked for me--being a master of kindness and patience with my kids (and everything else I want to become), will take time. 10,000 hours or possibly 10 years. That could be overwhelming to think about, but for me, it's actually reassuring. It helps me realize how silly it is for me to give up on myself for not being perfect in 1 day. It allows me the perspective to forgive myself and to realize that every effort I make toward improvement is one step closer to the mastery I will some day have. It also motivates me to put forth the effort to study and practice. To be intentional about making change.

As the Chinese proverb says, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. It's important to not let those thousand miles ahead bog me down, but to take the first step, and the step after that, and the step after that. And I know success will come as I stick with it.

I hope my realization will help you in your journey of change.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Kids and Reading

One of my favorite things is walking into the room to find my 2-year-old son plopped down on the ground "reading" a book. He looks at each page intently before turning to the next. And when he finishes that book, he grabs another from the shelf and repeats the process, sometime for more than 10 minutes. My 4-year-old daughter loves to "read" too, but she mostly prefers to be read to. Of all the things we have done wrong as parents, one thing we feel like we did right was putting a book case of children's book in the room where we spend most of our time, within easy reach of our children. My husband was telling me about a book he read that talks about setting yourself up for success. It tells about a woman who really wanted to go far in her profession, which required her to read academic journals at home in the evening. However, somehow she ended up watching TV every night instead. The book suggested the reason why wasn't merely a matter of a l...

Which Is More Educational

As I was snapping photos of my daughter and my husband enjoying the snow, I noticed the kids lined up on the elementary school grounds in the background. I'm grateful my daughter was able to have some one-on-one with her daddy--this one-on-one teaching and exploring seems priceless compared to the alternative of being herded around by one adult who is responsible for 25-30 other kids.... I'm just saying.

Miracle Mornings are Awesome! Will You Take the Miracle Morning Challenge?

In February 2017, I read the life-changing book, the Miracle Morning , by Hal Elrod--and I began implementing it immediately. For the past 10 months, I've had weeks where I started off each day with a "miracle morning", and weeks where I didn't. And I can tell you that my weeks with miracle mornings, without a doubt, went much better than the weeks without. When I start my day off with a miracle morning, I am calmer, more patient, and more focused on what really matters. And I am less anxious and tense throughout the day. Today, at the beginning of the new year, I am recommitting myself to have miracle mornings every day. Will you join me? What is a Miracle Morning? It's starting the day off right. There's an easy acronym, "SAVERS", that helps me remember. S--Silence This is time to ponder, pray, and or meditate. A--Affirmations Growing up, I thought affirmations were silly. But I’ve seen where negative self-talk gets me. Saying a...